The Tears We Cried
by ACertainJustice
Summary: CS Sara gets fired and dosent know how to handle it, when she shows up on catherine's doorstep, will she turn her away? Can Cath get Sara her job back? or is Sara lost in the bottom of a bottle forever? Read on...! new at this, really hard to explain
1. Prologue: Understand

**Summay: C/S Sara gets fired and dosent know how to handle it, when she shows up on catherine's doorstep, will she turn her away? Can Cath get Sara her job back? or is Sara lost in the bottom of a bottle forever? Read on...!**

_Boo! This is…all really new for me, and be warned that I have no clue where this is going. This is just a little drabble I wrote one day, and felt the urge to build on it. The first is a chapter/Prolgue...once you read it will make sence. _

_This is strongly suggested C/S, as well as flashbacks of GSR, once again, I don't know where this is going, so I have no clue if there will be any real slashy moments._

_Disclaimer…I won them in a poker game! Whoot! Okay….so I WILL win then in a poker game, I just haven't yet._

**Catherine POV**

Our relationship isn't purely about sex, god no; it is more of an understanding between two people that goes further then the physical planes, not to mention the sexual benefits

I only accepted it myself really, because she came to me with the need to be understood. I knew that need only to well, so I took her in and held her. I held her in till her cries subsided and her breathing steadied. It was only then that I realized how much I enjoyed holding her.

I was shocked when she showed up on my doorstep, since I had definitely been the most unwelcoming out of all of us. There she was however; trying to control the translucent tears that where threatening to fall.

After it all she wouldn't make eye contact with me for weeks. Don't get me started on when and when not to make eye contact, it still confuses me. I yearned for at least a quick peek into her eyes. I wanted to know what was behind those closed doors. I wanted to see through the secret window of her eyes that had been closed to the rest of the world.

I thought she would never speak a full sentence to me again and I felt incredibly confused. Why wouldn't she speak to me? It's not like something happened, we just sat there, we sat there and she cried on my shoulder like Lindsey did after she was teased at school. Nobody had teased Sara had they?

It wasn't in till two weeks later that I really spoke to her, and even then we didn't speak. This time my doorstep was filled with angry eyes. She came in with a violent manner, nearly taking the door off the hinges. I thought she was going to hurt me; she had smashed a bottle and was carrying it towards me. I couldn't bring myself to stop her but at the last minute the bottle came crashing down onto her own arm. She had hurt herself; she had hurt herself so that she would not hurt me.

I stared into her eyes and suddenly I didn't see the anger, nor the sadness, no, all I saw was a desperate need. It was the same need that I had felt on far too many occasions. It wasn't the need for sex, or for chocolate or for entertainment; it was the need for understanding. This is what we gave each other that night, and for many nights following.

_I know, this is random and weird...but well..i like it, so there! plase R&R! but go gentle on the flames, i am a sensitive soul!_

_-Dev_


	2. Comfort

_A/N okay, now that you have read the chapter before, this might make some more sense. This scene is pretty obvious…it comes in the second time that Sara shows up on Catherine's door step, the one with the beer bottle. Also I will keep changing POV every chappy._

**Sara POV**

I really don't know how I ended up on Catherine's doorstep feeling violent and upset. All I really remember is her comforting arms wrapping around me, making me feel safe and at home. For once in my life I could sob without feeling guilty, without feeling weak or vulnerable. No, in her arms I could cry and sob and still feel brave.

My arm was bleeding as she gently pried my unnaturally cold fingers off the beer bottle's neck. It was a Corona, one I distinctly remembered drinking earlier that day, and into the evening…and most likely before I got there. She whispered soft comforting words into my ear, as her slender fingers brushed the glass off my arm to examine the wound. Her expression resembled one I had seen so many times before, one that she wore when analyzing evidence at the lab.

At the lab, the lab, I don't even want to think of it. I try to push the memory aside, focusing solely in the blood that was dripping so methodically from my arm. It is easier said then done, especially when I loose the body warmth that had been wrapped around me, keeping out the cold chill of reality. My eyes followed her rhythmic body as she stood up and loosed her grip on me. More comforting words that I could not comprehend left her lips before she marched off towards the bathroom, questing for something to clean my wound with.

It felt like hours, and finally my savior returned, carrying a bandage, a blanket and god's gift from heaven- coffee. I gave her a small smile, and she returned it with a reassuring one. She took my hands in her own as slowly closed them around the steaming mug, bringing temporary warmth back into my limbs. That done I soon found a blanket around me, and my wound freshly cleaned. It wasn't in till all this had been completed and I was settled back into her friendly embrace did I find the courage to tell her why I was here.

"h….he fired me" there, I had said it. I lapsed into sobs again, sounding very much like a fish out of water. I gasped for air, trying to fight the acidic tears that where threatening to fall again. I couldn't fight them anymore, I didn't want to, so for the second time that week I cried onto Catherine's shoulder. Never had I felt such freedom and sorrow at the same time.

_Thats it! plase R&R and hopefully i will get another chappy up soon_

_-Dev_


	3. Empty

_A/N, gah, i considered making this apart of chapter two, but i have decided that im just going to do small chapters. I find they work easier especially if you are in a rush and can only read little parts at a time. Not to mention that with my hectic lifestyle, i only get on for small bouts of time...anyways..read on!_

**Catherine's POV.**

Tears threatened to fall from my eyes as well, as I sat there holding the sobbing shell of a woman once named Sara. Her whole body shook and I wrapped the blanket around her, desperate to keep her warm and comforted. For the first time in a long time I knew how to act around Sara. This is what I did, I comforted, I played mother and I kissed the booboo to make it feel better.

I pried her fingers off of my shirt and held her hands in mine, still completely silent. She responded with a whimper, and then relaxed when she realized that I was not pushing her away. Physical contact of any sort was new for us, but all caution was thrown to the wind as brought my free hand up to her chin. I turned her head slowly, and looked into the hollow brown eyes that I would soon come to love.

Her eyes where puffy and tearstained, along with my now ruined shirt. I didn't care though, and I gave her a small smile, keeping her head turned towards me.

"Sara, look at me sweetheart. I am sure Grissom didn't mean it, watch, you will go back tomorrow and everything will be fine." I spoke softly but firmly, I wasn't going to give up on Sara, not this time. Her beautiful teary eyes looked up at me before shaking her head slightly and mumbling something that resembled a no. I shook my head and cut her off mid-mumbling.

"no Sara, don't argue with me, I will call Grissom and get it sorted out," Sara looked as though she wanted to argue, but there was nothing much she could do about the situation. After all, it was my living room that she was sitting in. With one swift movement that only a dancer could do gracefully I got both me and Sara off the couch and walking slowly towards the bedroom. She started to protest, and once again I shushed her before placing the already half asleep Sara Sidle in my bed.

Sara Sidle…in MY bed. I refused to even think about it in till everything had blown over and I could think clearly about what I really wanted from Sara. Instead I pulled the covers over her, and gave a soft kiss on her forehead. The gesture was lost as she was already asleep, but I suppose it was for the best. I whispered my goodnight and turned off the light with one last look at the beautiful goddess that had been so hurt. I promised myself to never let her get hurt again.

With a sigh I grabbed the portable phone, ready to make the longest phone call of my life.

_There you have it! Remember...reviews make me happpppyyy:D:D:D_


	4. Safe

**Recap:**

**With a sigh I grabbed the portable phone, ready to make the longest phone call of my life. I started to dial, pressing each number with careful precision.**

**Ring, Ring…**

**Click, Procrastination was a fault of mine, one I fully intended on nurturing right now. Besides, I can always call back later…**

_Okay, I know that wasn't included in the last chapter, but I needed to add it to make everything make sense:P Anywyas, thanks to everyone who reviewed!!_

**Sara POV**

These aren't my sheets….This isn't my lamp, or my clock, hell this isn't even my empty coffee cup on the night stand. Whose is it? Suddenly it hit me like a ton of bricks, getting fired, drinking, coming to Catherine's. I panicked, my heart racing, what had I done? With a surge of effort I through the foreign covers off before pressing my feet to the cold hard ground. Everything hurt, my muscles where screaming in pain, and my head felt like someone had played "Whack a mole" with it.

With a Grunt I lift my tired body off the bed, before silently padding to the door. I reached to the door knob before halting in mid-action. I couldn't go out there, I couldn't face Catherine! The embarrassment burned deep in my chest as I slid down the door, landing with a thud at the bottom of it. My face bows down in shame as my hands reach up to cradle it. I was screwed…how much had I drunk last night?

Before my thoughts could inflict any more damage I heard someone speaking painfully loud with a vocabulary that only a Vegas born person would know. I was fully aware that eavesdropping was rude, but who ever said I was polite? With childish enthusiasm I pressed my ear to the door, trying to figure out who Catherine was having a spat with.

Shit….

Her voice rose an octave with every word, anger evident in her voice.

"Grissom, what the hell where you thinking…."

I don't care what she did! She will be at work tomorrow and you WILL have her working a case…"

"Screw paperwork, I know very well you haven't filed anything official yet…"

"For her own good…how would you know shit about her own good?..."

Three weeks Griss, but if you don't let her back after that you are going to loose TWO good CSIs'…"

"She showed up at my doorstep, maybe because the person she trusted most _betrayed_ her…"

"Fine, see you Monday."

I took a deep breath; did Catherine really offer to give up her job for me? Did Catherine really have that conversation with Grissom? And what did she mean by three weeks…?

"Sara, I know you where listening, the door squeaks every time you lean against it" Despite my confusion I couldn't help but smile, once a CSI always a CSI. With a sheepish grin I open the door, still situated on the floor. My grin soon disappears as my questioning eyes reach her serious ones.

"Hi" I said, my voice rough and hoarse from the previous night.

"Hey Sara" she replied, covering the space between us with her long stride. I gulped, trying desperately to get rid of the lump forming in my throat. Sudden flashes of everything that had happened rushed back to me, my heart tightened and sizzled and the mere thought of it. I was no longer a CSI, or at least I thought so.

"Sara…Sara sweetie look at me." Her tall frame hovered over my body, which was currently curled up in a fetal position on the floor, knees tucked tightly against my chest. Still, through her perpetual gaze, I failed to speak.

Slightly unnerved by my silence, she lowered the great work of art that was her body. She sat silently at my side, before wrapping her slender arms around me, pulling my now shaking body close to her chest. A girl could really get used to being held by Catherine willows. She gently lowered me till I was laying down, my head resting on her lap.

I don't know how long we sat there, her on the floor and my head in her lap, but those brief seconds where the best ones of my life.

_Reviews make me write faster!_


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